Contrary to popular belief, happiness – it does not mean to be in a good mood from sunrise to sunset, or just to experience positive emotions. It is rather a skill or way of thinking, which consists of qualities such as optimism, self-confidence, love, courage, and many others. It is a kind of feeling in your body, remains unchanged in any, even the most difficult situation.
One of the cruelest ironies is that the things we so often seek to please themselves, eventually feed our fears and lead to depression. This is the trap of happiness.
Trap one: try to buy happiness
The part of the brain devoted exclusively to fear. The brain stem keeps the instinctive fears and moments of stress or depression – we are not able to reflect rationally. The amygdala, for example, keeps the memories of all painful experiences. It is also responsible for those parts of the body that produce hormones in response to fear.
Fortunately, we have a neocortex – the area that connects intelligence with intuition and the subconscious.
There are five things that a person can buy:
All this provides only a temporary effect because it does not come from the inner person of integrity. He always wants more. Fear leads to demonstrate the trappings that seem to say to others: “Look, I am fine.”
Happy people do not chase money. They follow those they love most in the depths of his soul, and the money comes by itself. Pride for the work, for helping others – that creates a genuine feeling of happiness.
Trap two: pleasure
We get used to any external source of pleasure, whether it’s a new phone, food, clothes. Happy and smart people know it, so stop periodically saturated with consumer products, so that they subsequently again became for them new and fresh.
The hedonistic lifestyle exhausting and shows only the appearance of happiness attribute (and the money that we talked about earlier). It does not work for three reasons:
Neurological: overloads the brain’s pleasure centers, which block further sensations.
Psychological: creates high expectations and a sense of boredom.
Physical: the body creates tolerance and dependence.
Trap three: try to change and forget the past
About a hundred years ago, Freud noted that people often traumatic memories stored in the subconscious mind, pushing them out of consciousness. He called this area “the black box of the subconscious” and suggested that it can be “cleaned” with psychoanalysis.
Rights Freud or not, but there is another way: transcendence. You can rise above the fears and traumas, using force of intellect and spirit, to give new meaning to their experiences. Instead of feeling like a victim, these memories can be the most powerful motivator and source of wisdom.
Trap Four: strive to get rid of all the weaknesses
It is known that one must get rid of their weaknesses in order to achieve outstanding success. However, if you pay attention to the outside world, we will see that most of the changes his life, not by focusing on correcting themselves. These people focus on strengths.
Of course, something in itself is changed, but:
it should be a truly bad habits that are pulling you back;
you should not experience negative emotions from what you have them.
You probably have three good qualities – develop them. This will be enough for a happy life.
Trap Five: force yourself to happiness
You can not decide to be happy, just as it is impossible to decide to become higher. The thing is that happiness consists of many components that do not appear you immediately. Here is just a sample list of things needed for the emergence of this feeling:
The sense of freedom;
The belief in a bright future;
Many people only think they are happy they smile a lot, doing crazy things, find themselves in the spotlight. But if we dig a little deeper though, the crystal ball is broken about the harsh reality.
Happiness – it’s hard, hard work. Roll up your sleeves and believe in the best in response to the blows of fate and never lose faith in yourself.